Count Your Blessings, Not Your Problems…..

Written by on June 30, 2016


The past few days I have been sharing the message on social media for cats to “Count your blessings, not your problems!” As of late, my Facebook feed has been flooded with negative message after negative message. So much in fact that I think some people run to the phone to post about whatever negative happens to them quicker than they do positive things. And as you know, we have the power to speak things into existence. The more we dwell on the horrible things that happen to us, the more we will find ourselves waist-deep in the cesspool of bullshit.

Stop it!!!

It is time for us to celebrate the good things that are happening to us on the daily. Let us feel good this summer. I am sure we all have multiple things that are positive that we can broadcast on our platform, you never know it can become contagious. More of your friends may do the same. Next thing you know your timeline will have fewer men vs women, I hate my city, or what is wrong with “us” types of posts. And more posts celebrating love, family, friendship, and professional achievements.

To jump it off I will count a few of the many blessings I am fortunate to have.

1. My Wife – I knew I would get married at some point in my life, what I didn’t know was that I would marry my best friend. I am lucky enough to have a friend who happens to be my wife, my supporter, my hype-lady, and my muse. Some of my friends have been married and filed for divorce, while others are so busy trying to dodge their spouse that they may as well be bachelors/bachelorettes. But I have been blessed to have a lady that I can’t see myself ever being without. True I understand that relationships are work, marriages are no different. But this is a path that I am willing to take with my Queen.

2. My Daughters – Man I came into this marriage as a happily never changed a diaper, babysat, or wiped a nose type of guy. I laughed at friends who had “responsibilities” back in the day. They wiped asses, I copped Jordans. They paid child support (yep), I paid car notes, despite them trying to dodge the mandate of child support, by taking help from Law Offices of Vanden Heuvel & Dineen. Life was sweet. Now, however, I am the one wiping asses, driving to numerous practices, dropping off at daycare, sitting at track meets all day. And even though my life has made an 180-degree change in 2 years, I wouldn’t change it for the world. I am lucky that I am able to experience every ounce of what being a father is about.

3. My Ma Dukes – My mother has been in my corner from the beginning. As I get older and experience more of what being a parent is about, I appreciate the work that my mother had to put in. It is difficult raising a boy into a man, but it is even harder when a mother has to do it as a single parent. There are some lessons that a mother can never teach a boy, all she can do is instill a sense of self into the young man in hopes that he can navigate through the storm of life correctly when the weather gets rough. Ma Dukes was able to do that for me, and for that, I am forever in her debt. Especially when I look around at some of the folks I lost along the way due to their bad choices in life. It makes me feel that Ma Dukes did alright.

4. Real Friends – I have friends in my crew that I have known for 30 or more years. The way friends fall in and out of style, this is a true blessing. These dudes are cats I would consider my actual brothers. I know that if the shit hits the fan, these cats will be ready to roll with me; no questions asked. The list includes cats from the neighborhood, kindergarten, middle school, high school, and college. Real dudes. Real blessings.

5. Being An Educated Black Man Striving For Excellence – There were times in my educational journey when it looked like I wouldn’t make it to the finish line, whatever and wherever that line may have been. School did not interest me and my grades reflected it. However, sometime between my sophomore and junior year I had a job that forever changed my path; Hardee’s. Working at a fast food joint, burning my hands on some hot ass biscuits was enough to help me decide that I needed an education. This was not the path for me. Once I made the conscious decision that I needed to hit them books, I began to excel at it. I was able to take my talents to Grambling State University for my undergrad, and Marquette for my masters. Not only did I master my degrees, I also began to acquire Knowledge of Self, things they don’t teach at a school. Mentally, academically, and professionally I am striving for Excellence; Black Excellence.

6. A Roof Over My Head and Food On The Table, With Money For Other Shit – Simple as that Moguls. I enjoy being able to eat hot meals under a roof that has A/C or heat depending on the elements. I also enjoy being able to take trips/vacations/excursions when the feeling arises. I enjoy having things that a 40-hour a week job provides. Blessings.

7. A Rekindled Relationship With My Father – Over the years I had an estranged relationship with my dad. It wasn’t because of something he did, so much of what he didn’t do; he just wasn’t there. However, with the help of my lovely wife I was able to take an important step towards repairing or rebuilding a relationship that evaporated over time. When I visited pops a few years ago we were able to discuss some things and put days behind us. We are on the path of establishing a father/son relationship, and that is a blessing.

8. Kick Game Is Mean – I have kicks, shoes, tennis, sneakers, Jordans, Nikes, Kobes, Hard Bottoms, all of those good things. Some cats have piss wipers, but I have been blessed with the taste for good shoes. I have so many shoes that if I stopped now and my feet don’t get all fat anshit, I can survive life without having to buy another pair. Blessings.

9. Health – I am not the most healthy cat out here. I mean I can stand to lose a few pounds, or run a few laps. (No this is not an invitation for you, Poindexter, to ask me to run a marathon for the 1002nd time.) But I am blessed to have good health. With so many peers my age falling around me, a brother has to cherish the fact that I am still here without any major hiccups. Blessings.

10. A Great Life So Far – (Knock on wood) My life has been pretty good. I have a loving family, great friends, and enough memories to last 3 lifetimes. Of course, you can always have more of something, but my new outlook is no problems and no regrets. Live life to the fullest and enjoy each and every minute. Because no matter how bad you think you got it when you look at the big picture they may be nothing more than 1st World problems, shit ain’t so bad. Sit back and enjoy the path you are taking…. Life Is Good.

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