Did You Hear The One About Danny P Ocean Getting Married???

Written by on July 15, 2014

In about 30 days your boy Danny P (The P stands for Poitier) Ocean will be jumping the broom!! Who woulda thunk? Not I. I took pride for years in the fact that I was the last of the playboys. While all my friends fell off one by one like roaches getting sprayed with Raid, I sat there with a grin on my mug as if saying “sucks to be him!”

Now I always thought I would get married, but I just didn’t know when. I lived by the rule “Don’t get married before 30!” That was something I held on to tight like bars on a roller-coaster. I just waited and bided my time until Cupid shot me in the ass….. and guess what Moguls I have been shot.

Which is a little surprising for a ninja like me, I didn’t plan on any of this. I enjoyed the single life, dating women and when the idea of commitment became too much of a burden I faded away. You know the story all too well. Boy meets girl, boy likes girl, boy dates girl, girl becomes attached, boy fades away to start the cycle all over again. That was me in a nutshell. Never wanting to become too attached to a lady, because I never knew how long the dance would last. It wasn’t that I necessarily enjoyed being non-committal or a “player,” I enjoyed being FREE.

Freedom for a man is what being American is about. If I want to stay out and chase the sun up I can dammit!!! Why?? Because I had no one to answer to. If I wanted to smoke cigar after cigar while watching Soprano episodes I could. Why? You guessed it, because I wanted to. If I wanted to stare at the ceiling all damn day from the comforts of my bed I could. Why??? Well I think you get the picture. I had wings, and when you have wings you are free. Unless you are in the zoo, but that is another post.

Being single for me was not about dating multiple women at the same time; that can become expensive and nerve-wracking. Single for me just meant that I had more money to trick off and buy Jordans, gold chains, and whatever the hell else I wanted to buy.

And I was fine with that lifestyle for the most part. But then she happened……

So here we are a little over a moon cycle away from me committing the rest of my life to someone. Someone that I love more than I thought was possible for a player like me. Someone that I won’t mind sharing my orange juice with. Someone who can even wear my classic Michigan Wolverine Nike shorts to bed when she finds them clean in my drawers. Yep she can have at it. And I can’t imagine it any other way.


*For the next month I will document my final days as a bachelor and all of the important moments leading up to my big day.

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