Don’t Be That Dude…….. Rules For Attending Football Parties

Written by on October 8, 2013


Well Moguls NFL season is in full swing, and by now unless you are a loner you should have been to a party or two. I have. And like clockwork I’m always reminded on what I need not do while attending these get togethers. And for your reading pleasure I have provided you with 5 pointers to follow so that you don’t end up looking like that dude!!!!

  1. Don’t Show Up With Something You Don’t Eat or Drink!!!!– Don’t come styling into the party with a platter of some shit that you won’t even eat!! If you don’t grab a plate of the tuna casserole that your mother made, what makes you think others want a glob of that shit? We also don’t want to drink a case of diet soda!! At a party no one is thinking about their weight or calorie counting. Save that for the treadmill Monday morning. If you don’t want it, others don’t want it.
  2. Don’t Be The One Who Talks Throughout The Whole Game!!!!! Moguls game day is not the time to catch your friends up about the lames you work with. Or don’t tug their ear about how you and the Mrs. ain’t cutting it anymore. No one gives a damn. They are here to watch football!!! Not listen to you and your 99 Problems.
  3. Don’t Eat More Than Your Fair Share!!! A football party is not your chance to eat cats out of house and home. Get your fair share of food and keep it moving. We all know it is first come first serve, but damn everybody who is present when the food is brought out should have a chance to taste one wing at least. Especailly if you sittin there with a 20 piece on your plate.
  4. Don’t Get Drunk!!!! Yeah have fun with those touchdown shots and free beer the host provides for you, but know your limit!! It is not a good look when you are pissing on yourself in the bathroom by the 3rd quarter because you have had 10 shots, 6 beers, and 2 bottles of Ciroc!!! Calm you ass down!!!
  5. Return The Favor!!!! Have a party at your house from time to time. Don’t be the one who always goes to others cribs but never opens up his man-cave. Football is a 20 game season including the playoffs, you can host at least one!!

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